Seriously? You work at Hooters. What did you expect?

This chick employed by Hooters was told by management in her yearly review that she needed to lose weight. Her story has made national headlines.

First of all, she works for Hooters. Did she think a business called, “Hooters”, aka Big Titties, would evaluate its employees based on non-aesthetic work standards? Similarly, actors are asked all the time to lose weight or gain weight for roles. So do dancers, boxers, wrestlers, professional cheerleaders, porn stars, etc. Is it fair? I don’t know. But, in this case, this chick works for HOOTERS (aka: Big Titties Restaurant.)

I understand the pressures of being a woman and society’s need to dictate to us what our bodies should look like, even in the workplace. I’m a nurse. In the hospital, I prefer to wear baggy scrubs. I’ve been told by co-workers (male and female) that I should wear more form fitting scrubs. When I’ve been seen outside the hospital, I’ve been told (by male and female co-workers), “Wow. I didn’t know you had a rack!” True story. Every time. Very annoying. Every time.

But, here’s the thing: I’m at work. I don’t want to appear sexual, sensual, or attractive. I’m a nurse. I clean up shit and bodily fluids. The hospital really isn’t the time to think about what I look like. That’s just me. If I wanted to be judged and valued for what I look like in the workplace, then I’d be a stripper or a housewife. (Kidding. Housewives, relax!)

In this Hooters chick situation, she works at Hooters. HOOOOOTEEEERS! When you are a patient in the hospital, you could give two fucks what I look like as long as I save your life. And when you go to Hooters, you could give two fucks what the food tastes like (Seriously. It isn’t fine dining.), just as long as it is served up by a good looking chick with a nice set of hooters on a trim body.

Some of you may attack my claim of being a feminist. Go ahead and waste your time. The chick works at Big Titties Restaurant. Think about this before you start writing me e-mails about what a bitch I am.

Big. Titties. Restaurant.

Now, if I were to open a restaurant called "Hawt Dawg!", my employees would need to have huge bulges dangling from a rock hard body. I mean: I'm naming the place Hawt Dawg! (You entrepreneurs out there, don't you dare take my restaurant idea.) Would I have great food? Fuck no! Would I have hot dogs with hawt dawgs! You bet your hooters I would!

So, once again remember: if you work for Big Titties Restaurant and have profited off your big ol' titties in the past, don't be shocked if your job is on the line because you're starting to look a little chunk by some arbitrary standard.

Never forget that you chose to work for Big Titties Restaurant to begin with. This isn't Thailand. You weren't forced into a sexually objectifying job. Deal with it.

Thanks.